A Year Into This Pandemic, & I Tried To Take On Disney…

The Mommy Confessions®

A Year Into This Pandemic, & I Tried To Take On Disney…

March 12, 2020, my family went into quarantine. It was my Aupair, my two kids and I. That was it.

We went months where we we didn’t see anyone, except my parents. And, even that was through our living room window. It was, and is, a very scary time in the world.

Shortly after going into quarantine (but long enough to be sick of being on house arrest), I told my son, “as soon as this is over, I’m going to take you and your sister to Disney.”

I never in a million years imagined that a year later, we’d still be in the throes of a pandemic.

Recently, I had heard about all the extra precautions Disney has been taking. The parks are capped at 35% capacity, some “high risk” attractions are closed, and there are hand sanitizer stations everywhere.

For most people, it’s probably a great time to go to Disney. However, for me… I’m currently in a mild panic attack in my hotel room, bc… well…. as it turns out, going from not having walked inside a grocery store, or eating inside a restaurant, in over a year, to going to an amusement park wasn’t exactly the best way to rip that high anxiety, antisocial bandaid off.

I thought everything would be empty. A park to ourselves. But, that’s hardly the case. Wait times for rides are an hour long. Even for water or a popcorn, there’s a 20 minute wait.

This is when my anxiety makes me feel so small. So weak. So overwhelmed.

Why would I think this was an ok idea? Why can’t I keep my anxiety in check? Why does my anxiety have to ruin EVERYTHING?!

*To be clear… this is NOT a dig at Disney. They’ve done a great job. It’s just a prime example of how being isolated for over a year, to going to an amusement park (where I expected it to be “empty”), hit my system in ways, I never imagined. Perhaps, these are some of the “lasting effects of this past year”. It’s certainly my reminder that, yes, I want to get back to normal.  At the same time, I need to figure out what that new normal is. Slowly. And, obviously, incredibly gently.

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Alexandra Fisher